Who I Can Help:
Most businesses still think they can win over customers if they just shout louder than the competition.
But that’s the Neanderthal way of advertising.
People don’t want to be yelled at; they want to be seduced. They love adventures and fantasy. They’re Jasmine from Aladdin. They want you to take them on a magic carpet ride and show them a whole new wooooorld. They need to be wooed like they’re on a first date.
Most businesses also don’t have the patience or the balls for this, and that’s exactly where your advantage lies.
If you agree, then I can help you.
Who Is Not a Good Fit:
Two types of business personalities that I run from:
- Discount-addicts and Presidents-Day-Sale junkies. If you’ve trained your customers to always wait for the next sale, then ain’t much I can do for you. If you Pavlov-dogged your audience to bargain-hunt, then I desire no part in that race to the bottom.
- Chicken Littles who think the sky is falling if someone doesn’t like their ad. If you’re afraid of offending even a single person, then keep walking. If you filter your message down to a watery G-rated seltzer that everyone and their grandma can stomach, let’s NOT talk.
Because if your ads are too weak to offend, then they’re also too weak to persuade.
What I Do For Clients:
Should we click; I’ll find your customer, I’ll throw a brick through their window, I’ll hogtie them, I’ll kidnap them, and I won’t apologize for any of it. (They always come back for seconds, trust me.) Here’s a quick guide on how I do it.
You can have the best product on the market but that don’t mean jack if nobody knows about it.
That’s why people call me up, because my words get people’s attention. I use humor and wit to take un-sexy, boring products and transform them into share-worthy, laugh-out-loud concepts.
Give me an ad lame and desperate as a fanny pack mating call and watch me slam it into 5th. Or throw me the reins and I’ll craft you a monster influencer from the ground up. Just for fun on the weekends I write comedic direct response ads for “unsellable” products that have people still calling weeks after they sell out. Point is, my ads illuminate your business from new and exciting angles, which inspires people’s bank accounts to striptease for you.
I’ve heard people say:
“Asia’s talent for compelling snark is as immense as the landmass her name represents.”
– Brian Swichkow, Founder, Ghost Influence
“Whenever I need sales copy to come alive, leap off the page and make a memorable impression on my clients, I always turn to Asia. Simply put, copywriting grabs eyeballs, tells a story and gets people to open their wallets.”
– Mike Harrington, Bestselling author and Owner TheAuthorityAdvantage.com
“The story should probably be renamed ‘Asia vs. Goliath.’ Because trust me, she will win.”
– Sean Ogle, Founder, Location Rebel
“You’re a bit nuts.”
– Roy H. Williams