I’m that good. And I can do it for you. In one week, I was able to get a 560% increase in followers to a page.

There’s the proof. An actual screenshot of Facebook confirming my Marketing-Midas-Touch. Normally I charge quite a bit for this information, but today I’m letting you in on the secret. To increase the number of followers by 560% in one week…

Buy them.

Facebook gives you a handy button that lets you promote your page. (“Lets” = “take your money” “Promote” = “makes your post appear in people’s timeline”)

And, damn if it didn’t work!

560%, baby! Now, you’re probably one step ahead of me: The page is promoting something amazing, right? A free car? Dancing girls? A lifetime supply of bacon-wrapped-cheese-beer?

None of the above.

It’s a page that, honestly, doesn’t do much of anything.

In fact, the page is called: “A Page that Doesn’t Do Much of Anything.”

And for about $11.43, I was able to jack up the followers 560% in one week.

There are two things at play here:

1: Digital advertising is easy to buy.

2: Digital advertising is an overly complicated mess, for no good reason.

In the past 6 years, advertising giants like Proctor and Gamble have put pressure on the online ad industry to address phantom numbers coming from bots (unattended computers that scan websites creating the illusion of a visitor). Google and Facebook have responded and are doing a better job, but the task is like grabbing onto an oily water balloon.

Google acknowledges that half of your ads are never seen. By people. With money.

increase your visibility by promoting your ad. It can't work if nobody sees it.

According to the graph above from Think With Google “…56.1% of all impressions are not seen, but the average publisher viewability is 50.2%.”

Think about how double-speak-insane that sentence is. 56.1% of all IMPRESSIONS (meaning the times an ad is placed in front of you) are NOT seen (meaning the ad wasn’t placed in front of you).

An alarming piece earlier this month in Forbes documented how companies large and small shut off hundreds of millions of dollars in digital advertising and saw virtually no drop in revenue.

Luis Castañeda, Wizard of Ads partner and wise digital Sherpa, says much of this is because of “poor management of ad campaigns due to a ‘spray and pray’ mentality. Certainly, fraud is an issue on display campaigns, and you have to anticipate that and follow up on results.”

You can’t walk away from the Crock-Pot and expect to come back to a perfectly made pork roast. Somebody has to watch over it. Somebody whose only interest is in your results. Click here and sort by “digital marketer” to find a bakers-dozen of pros to choose from.

Your business is caught between the GoogleFacebook duopoly and flimflam artists who won’t tell you the numbers are shady because it shrinks the data on their magic dashboard. Nobody at our firm cares where you advertise because we don’t get a commission from buying media. We just care if it works. You don’t have to hire us, but for the love of your business, find somebody who cares and pays attention.

I’d like to tell you there’s a magic box and a perfect formula, but if something like that existed, you’d be using it already.

Latest posts by Johnny Molson (see all)